People don’t make the most of themselves.
That is what I really care about and that is why I have started this blog.
I have this real gut instinct that the one, true reason for anyone not getting the best of themselves is CONFIDENCE. Every thought train and/or deep philosophical moment, and in debates between myself on the Tube/train/lying awake at night, all seem to boil down to one simple thing: confidence. Period.
I don’t have any real scientific research for you here, to be honest, but I truly believe that lack of self-confidence is the sole, if not at least cause of obesity today. I believe in my heart of hearts that it is the reason for the existence of unemployment. Lack of self-confidence. it’s the reason why people don’t succeed in life, whether it be academically, professionally, trusting their partner, being faithful to their partner… I think most problems in life come down to self-confidence.
So why don’t we all just go ahead and be self-confident, and the world will be an amazing place…?
The problem being, is that a lack of self-confidence stems from the worth we give to each other. We are all competing against one another from the outset. There is a fixed model that is seen as ideal, and that ideology is drummed into us from nursery, up until the work place. And if you don’t fit, people have little confidence in you. I truly believe that every single person on this earth has something unique to contribute and has talents that the person next to you has.
But I see confidence as the polar opposite of fear. Fear is prevalent. Often subconsciously. With fear, we are all punching each other out the way, gulping for air, looking for confidence in gratification. But it just doesn’t work.
After reading a lot, doing therapy (after my previous lil meltdown/ bout of depression- read previous posts) and a life of people watching (of which I am a pro!), I am convinced that confidence breeds confidence.
In other words, by seeing and focusing on the worth in others, but not as better than me, but as unique to them, I will finally start to believe in my own worth.
So these next few days, I’m going to do an experiment. Whenever I worry about being judged, or fear an outcome, or doubt myself, I am just simply going to stop it. Look around, and notice the worth in those around me. Not to compare myself to them, but just to value them as uniquely talented.
Who knows what I will find in this experiment- but hey, it’s worth a try. We all deserve all the confidence in the world to be our brilliant true selves.
Do you think self-confidence is the key to success? How do you remember your self worth and fill those around you, as well as yourself, with confidence? Please leave a reply below or message me on Twitter! I would really appreciate your thoughts.
Just a few books and blog posts that have inspired me in this topic. There are too many to list/remember.
Mindfulness: Finding Peace in a Frantic World by Mark William
Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki
Blog on empowering yourself: http://www.superlativelyrude.com/
Blog posts on knowing your worth: http://www.themiddlefingerproject.org/
Blog on failing and bouncing back with confidence (where the guy whose company I work for talks about me failing lol): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLiEwwYEfiY